April 9, 2013

Changes...


I handed in my resignation at work last Thursday. And it was the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire 25 (almost 26) years of existence. As of May 3rd I will no longer be at my current place of employment, where I've worked for over 4 years. Where I started out at the bottom and worked my way to the top. I won't be there anymore. And I still don't really know how I feel about that

My very close friend (and co-worker) bawled (and I mean bawled) when I told her. Which of course made ME bawl. There were tears from others when I told the rest of the staff yesterday. And I know it should make me feel good that they are upset that I'm leaving because it shows what kind of relationship I have with my employees. But it really just makes me want to curl up into a ball and cry

I just have to keep thinking of the positives of my switch in workplaces: I'll no longer spend an hour and a half of my day commuting to work. I'll be making more money starting out than I do currently at a place I dedicated 4 years to. I'll be saving so much money on fuel every month (and that money will go directly into savings for NYC!). I'll be closer to my family. I won't feel so run down from long days at work and on the road. I know this. But it's still hard to think that my last day is looming. May 3rd is going to be a very emotional day. The last couple of weeks have already been so emotional with just thinking of all the possibilities

I'm scared of the unknown. And I hate change. I know that I'll always be welcomed back to a position at my current place of employment but its scary to leave somewhere that you've been for four years. I'm so comfortable where I am know that it's definitely going to take some adjusting to my new position

I'm so, so, sooo glad that Vegas is less than a week away. I'm shutting my brain off for the whole 5 days and not letting myself think about work and all the changes. I'll probably be too drunk to anyways

I'll miss my co-workers (and friends so much). I'll miss the children like crazy. But I feel like this is the next step that I have to take in my career. I'm going to be starting out at a brand new Centre. A centre with only 33 children instead of 90. A HUGE difference when it comes to what my job entails. I'm excited, nervous, sad, happy, confused, weary, elated, panicked, anxious, stressed, and fearful. All of these different emotions at once. And they are playing mind games with me. I think its going to take quite awhile to get all of these emotions under control!


2 comments:

  1. Good luck with your new job. It sounds like you made the right decision even though it was hard to do.

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  2. Oh of course everyone would be devastated to lose you! But change is good and even if only your commute changes, I'm sure it will be a huge improvement! Congratulations on the new job!!

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